{"id":563,"date":"2011-07-30T16:08:16","date_gmt":"2011-07-31T02:08:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/?p=563"},"modified":"2011-07-30T16:08:16","modified_gmt":"2011-07-31T02:08:16","slug":"watermelon-update-yall","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/2011\/07\/30\/watermelon-update-yall\/","title":{"rendered":"Watermelon Update Y&#8217;all!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">And to-day, this happened.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Had purchased two watermelons: one for the backpack, and one for the <a href=\"http:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/?p=515\">workout<\/a>. Performing Watermelon Workout while walking down the Ave., a girl (wearing a coat on an eighty-degrees-out day &#8212; green coat, too; she wasn&#8217;t even rocking the goth-wear) asked, &#8220;Is that your weights?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">After I responded in the affirmative, she noted, &#8220;Tasty weights!&#8221; Couldn&#8217;t <em>even<\/em> disagree.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">So, went to the quad, et the watermelon, goofed around for a while, and cetera; then began hoofing it back <em>up<\/em> the Ave., just doing a kinda half-assed workout with the second watermelon. Well, I&#8217;ll be god damned if the same girl wearing the same green coat on the same eighty-degrees-out day happened to be standing on a different corner, noticed me, and questioned, &#8220;Is that the same watermelon?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">No, it wasn&#8217;t.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">&#8220;Uh&#8230;&#8221; After a several-seconds Pause Of Consternation, she blurted, &#8220;What&#8217;s going on with the watermelons??&#8221;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Me: &#8220;It&#8217;s the newest rage!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">I&#8217;m telling you people: catch this wave or get pulled under. &#8217;cause the Watermelon Workout is going to fuck this country <em>up<\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>And to-day, this happened. Had purchased two watermelons: one for the backpack, and one for the workout. Performing Watermelon Workout while walking down the Ave., a girl (wearing a coat on an eighty-degrees-out day &#8212; green coat, too; she wasn&#8217;t &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/2011\/07\/30\/watermelon-update-yall\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-563","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-culture","category-fruit"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/563","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=563"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/563\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=563"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=563"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=563"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}