{"id":4200,"date":"2012-06-26T22:41:33","date_gmt":"2012-06-26T15:41:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/?p=4200"},"modified":"2012-06-26T23:29:50","modified_gmt":"2012-06-26T16:29:50","slug":"eat-durian-as-much-as-you-can","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/durianapocalypse.net\/travel\/2012\/06\/26\/eat-durian-as-much-as-you-can\/","title":{"rendered":"“Eat Durian As Much As You Can”"},"content":{"rendered":"

[dc]Y[\/dc]esterday morning, Monday, (almost<\/em> literally) bumped into Lindsay, co-conspirator with her partner Rob of the second-greatest blog<\/a> on the entire triple-dub: Year Of The Durian<\/em>. (Sorry guys, Shorpy<\/a> will always be #1\u2026)<\/p>\n

They\u2019re just on their way out of town, in search of the elusive (perhaps mythical) \u201cElephant<\/a> Dung Durian\u201d: Durian that\u2019s been swallowed whole by an elephant, then shat out undigested \u2013 but now delicious beyond belief. Good luck, friends!<\/p>\n

[dc]W[\/dc]ouldn\u2019t want to be seen to be endorsing British Imperialism; but who could possibly resist visiting a site called \u201cFort Cornwallis\u201d? Not me!<\/p>\n

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It\u2019s kind of neat, with a few structures still in tact after all these decades.<\/p>\n

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The displays set up giving a basic history of the fort are fun: though seemingly written by a group of eight-year-old kids, it can\u2019t help getting in some little jibes at British and French Imperial behaviour. But the best bit is about the fort\u2019s founder having \u201cforked out\u201d his own money for a needed upgrade.<\/p>\n

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There\u2019s a goofy cannon up on the wall, overlooking the sea, about which everyone is all gaga.<\/p>\n

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I saw one girl leaning<\/em> on the cannon \u2013 technically not against the rules, I guess.<\/p>\n

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Save for the traffic, it\u2019s quite a wonderful little town. It\u2019s not difficult to understand why it\u2019s received World Heritage status. But here\u2019s the difference with Luang Prabang: in the latter, most everybody gets \u2018round via bicycle; while here in George Town, it\u2019s all motorcycles and automobiles. And they\u2019re so loud<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Still, there are certainly plenty of neat old buildings here; and the people are very friendly and interesting. And definitely some great signs.<\/p>\n

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The tallest skyscraper is something of a focal point for the city.<\/p>\n

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It looks<\/em> reminiscent of a Wilco album cover, true; but its name<\/em> is the real drawing card: KOMTAR. Say it with a growl in the throat, and it\u2019s as though it were an villainous mastermind in a Saturday Morning cartoon. As the building fairly dominates the skyline, one never fails to take sight of it, and so reflexively cry out in fear of the evil dastard KOMTAR’s irrepressible minions.<\/p>\n

Some of the temples here are pretty wild; more evocative of Haiti, perhaps, than Southeast Asia.<\/p>\n

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I arrived at one last night just in time for \u201cEvening\u00a0 Pooja\u201d.<\/p>\n

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It seemed vaguely like some kind of Eyes Wide Shut <\/em>shit was getting ready to go down\u2026<\/p>\n

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But I didn\u2019t stick around to find out. Visited some other temples to-day, Tuesday.<\/p>\n

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Quite nice, even though\u2026<\/p>\n

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But then, the camera\u2019s batteries were up and finished, so I decided to put off the temple explorations, and instead visit the largest mosque in town.<\/p>\n

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Very beautiful (and the intermittent prayer calls coming from the mosques in town are stunningly, heartbreakingly gorgeous). I went to take a \u201cguided tour\u201d of the interior, which turned into an hour-long recruitment pitch. Wow, Islam\u2019s even stupider than I\u2019d realised. I mean, not as stupid as Christianity or anything; but still, pretty damned stupid.<\/p>\n

The guided tour of the biggest church in town (the first Anglican church in Southeast Asia) was much more fun, if quite brief in duration.<\/p>\n

Apart from the prayer calls, the music blaring out from temples, shoppes, and homes here is incredibly wonderful. Possibly even as good as in Cambodia.<\/p>\n

[dc]D[\/dc]own at Times Square, there wasn\u2019t any kind of buffet going on; but I did manage to explode my budget all the same. Went in for a two-time prize-winning variety, the Musan King.<\/p>\n

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It\u2019s even better than it looks. When Hassan, the wild and crazy vendor to whom we have been previously introduced, asked me how it was, I couldn\u2019t even find the words. I managed to eke out an awestruck, \u201cAmazing!\u201d But that didn\u2019t even come close to telling the story.<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is the King Of Durian!\u201d Hassan declared (i.e., the King of the King of fruits). \u201cAnd now you are eating it; so\u2026you might<\/em> be a king!\u201d He\u2019s very charismatic, you can see.<\/p>\n

Four Welsh youngsters staying here at the guest house tried their first Durian to-day. They weren\u2019t impressed. Well, I guess if you can\u2019t love Durian from Penang, it just wasn\u2019t meant to be\u2026<\/p>\n

Meanwhile, to-day I went for another named variety, the Ang Bak Kia. As he was cutting it open for me, Hassan predicted, \u201cWhen you eat this, you will be mesmerised all the way back to Seattle!\u201d I think he\u2019s right.<\/p>\n

What an experience \u2013 the first time that eating a Durian has actually brought tears to my eyes (and no jokes from the cheap seats, people!). Also had a bit of Hor Lor and D11; both superior — but it\u2019s the Ang Bak Kia which will be haunting my dreams until long after<\/em> I\u2019ve returned to the States. Pretty sure it won’t have been my last one\u2026<\/p>\n

Turns out, Hassan and his brother operate a quite large stall near the airport \u2013 a \u201cDurian Paradise\u201d, he calls it. Listening to him talk about Durian makes me want to follow him to the ends of the Earth. The Shaman and his Acolytes: \u201cYou\u2019ll smell \u2018em before you see \u2018em.\u201d<\/p>\n

I asked how many Durian fall in Penang each season? About a million, he says. Wow! I then asked if he knew of Jim Morrison. I think he may have thought I was being a bit patronising, as he answered, \u201cI only know Jason Mraz.\u201d After I picked myself up off the floor, I told him that I thought that he<\/em> is the Asian Jim Morrison: the philospher\/poet of Durianism and all for which it stands.<\/p>\n

Tomorrow, he says, I will eat a Red Prawn<\/a>. I was able to resist quoting Lawrence Of Arabia<\/em>: \u201cThen it shall be so, Lord.\u201d But I\u2019m sure I won\u2019t<\/em> be able to resist, on the morrow, the Prawn\u2019s siren call.<\/p>\n

[dc]I[\/dc]n other news, very<\/em> highly recommend<\/a> Episode #7 of theAlpha To Omega Podcast:<\/p>\n

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Colette O’Neill, the creative genius behind the Bealtaine Cottage permaculture small-holding in the west of Ireland and the A Life In The Country<\/em> blog, is this week’s guest. We chat about her love of permaculture; how she decided to give up her career as a teacher in London and return to Ireland to turn an old bachelors’ cottage and three acres of poor land in the wilds of County Roscommon into an oasis of abundance. We hear of forest gardens, stylish wooden verandas, her pantry, ancient burial sites, fairy rings, living outside the monetary system, the cuckoo, and space travel.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

This is an incredibly inspirational interview.<\/p>\n

Also! I have selected a “Personal Anthem”. The way it works is, when all the jag-offs at the stadium or watching on teevee are busy bleating up their star-spangled bullshit, I’ll instead be blissing out to…<\/p>\n